When I first started doing production stuff at my church, I did it for the gear. I wanted the chance to play with the gear. I didn’t really care about what we were doing or why. I just like the shiny new stuff.
Little did I know that there was way more to being a technical artist in the local church than the equipment I got to use. For one thing, there was the reason we were using all the gear…to create a worship experience for our congregation to meet with God. Secondly, the interpersonal dynamics at play between the stage and the booth was not something I was prepared for.
After a few years passed, I realized that the relationship between the worship leader and me was the ballgame! I had a difficult time getting anything done when our relationship was strained. Since it was my job to execute their ideas, I needed to figure out how to get along with these people!
It was one thing to realize this, but what could I do about it? How do I make sure that the relationship I have with my worship pastor can lead to amazing collaboration? At the base of it all is trust. Me trusting them, and them trusting me. So how do I build that trust? Here are three ideas.
Do Your Job
This isn’t quite as harsh as “Just do your job, and shut up!”, but on some level I’m not joking.
One of the most effective ways to build trust with the people on stage is to be good at what you do. As a production person, that means nailing all the little things that nobody really understands or cares about. Input lists. Stage plots. Neat and tidy backstage storage. Mics on when they are supposed to be. Lights aimed at the right things.
These are all very “boring” tasks, but they make up the foundation of excellent production. Without them, we can’t hope to go deeper in the collaboration with our friends on stage. If you can’t do the “boring” stuff well, why would they want to hear what you think about their work or their ideas? It is difficult to talk about wanting the process to be better, if we aren’t handling our side of the equation well. Let’s say you complain about a particular guitar tone messing with your mix, but no one can hear the worship leader when they are talking over the music. Why would anyone change their guitar tone when it’s obvious to them you don’t know what you’re talking about?
The best way to build a solid relationship with your worship leader is to be as good at your job as possible. Without excuses. Without complaining. Just nail it.
Buy Coffee
Find out your worship leader’s favorite foofy drink from Starbucks and show up with it. (Or maybe they’re a Dunkin’ person. Know the difference!) Do it more than once. Maybe even sit down and drink the coffee together. Talk about stuff. And not all work stuff. Life stuff. “How are you doing?” “How are your kids?” “What’s your favorite color?”
Working with someone is not the same as knowing them.
The context for our relationship is generally speaking, the pressure cooker of rehearsal and services. When we aren’t in the intensity of work, then we’re in meetings to figure out what we’re doing. Our whole relationship is built around a very narrow window of each of our personalities.
You know what else? I bet that your worship leader doesn’t know all that much about you either. This coffee time is a perfect chance to share about your own life outside of production at your church.
Who knows? Maybe you’ll discover that you like the same college football team, or the same flavor of ice cream, or that maybe you have the same favorite color!
When you know someone beyond just one dimension of who they are, there is a chance you’ll trust each other a little more. You know me. I know you. You are more than just the mistakes you make or the ways you frustrate me on a Sunday morning.
Share the Responsibility
Pulling off weekend services together is a challenge. Or at least my part is. Their part looks easy. Not only that, but sometimes it feels like they make my part even more challenging than it needs to be.
The reality is that the people on stage have a difficult job also, just in a different way than me. I’m trying to make the service awesome and they’re just worried about their indoor man scarf matching their ripped skinny jeans. Right?!
While it seems like we have different goals that are on opposing sides, we are really trying to solve the same problem but from completely different perspectives. I’m focused on executing the plan and they’re wondering whether or not the plan is the right one.
We need to combine forces on this. We both want to make something amazing for our churches, and the combination of what you do and what they do is the result. Share the load together. Work together. Come up with a plan together. Lift the load together.
Building a relationship with your worship leader isn’t easy. It must be built on a foundation of trust. To make the most of each of our strengths, we owe it to each other and to our churches to build a solid relationship.
Learn more about building relationships through FILO digital resources:
Check out Creative Chemistry – Production and Platform Teams Working Together to Create Transformational In-Person and Online Gatherings By John Cassetto and Brittany Crimmel if you are interested in learning more about building healthy relationships with your worship leader. And find even more resources on this topic, and many others, at filo.org/filo-resources.
